DR. JEKYLL, A.K.A, THE GOOD BIG B

Jun 12, 2013 by

DR. JEKYLL, A.K.A, THE GOOD BIG B

Since every blog post thus far has been me discussing my trouble-making personality Mr. Hyde, I’ve decided to give you a quick glimpse into Dr. Jekyll, a.k.a. the good Big B.  He inhabits the Bay Area, but unfortunately he only exists there.  Once I step out of San Francisco or its neighboring towns, even if it’s just a weekend trip to LA, I revert back to the bad Big B…partying, being irresponsible, and all the other fun stuff that is associated with this blog.

Knowing that my inner party animal is constantly trying to get me out of the Bay Area, I make sure that when I’m up here I’m actually a very productive member of society.  I work, I work out, and I stay away from any potential distractions.   If you see me partying at the bars in San Francisco, feel privileged cause it doesn’t happen much.  The good Big B would actually have a very boring blog……and that’s why you will only have one blog post dedicated to the dear Dr. Jekyll.  I  mean, how much do you guys want to hear about how I work out twice a day, eat healthy, and wake up every morning at 7 when I’m up north.

“GET BACK TO THE FUN POSTS!  I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT YOU WORKING OUT TWICE A DAY!”

I can hear you guys! I promise we’re almost done with Dr. Jekyll, a.k.a. the good Big B…..3 more minutes and we won’t discuss him ever again.

And what is this job that allows me to take a week here and a week there to travel around?  Well, I work as a court liaison and get assigned by the court to murder and death penalty cases.  I’m in charge of putting together and summarizing all the discovery from the District Attorney’s office and keeping the attorneys abreast of what is going on in the case.  Oftentimes the amount of discovery is in the tens of thousands of pages.  As for my day to day activities, I’m reading statements, depositions, listening to jailhouse interviews, going over ballistics reports, and oftentimes having to look at autopsy photos.  Yup, having to look at dead bodies….Not fun stuff!  Now you can understand while I might want to have a cocktail or 6 when I have a little time off.  And luckily, since these cases are months away from going to trial when I am given them, if I decide to take a week or 10 days off, it’s not frowned upon.

A lot of the work is summarizing and presenting the information to the respective lawyers, but there are times when I will find conflicting information or testimony and there have been cases that have been altered by small discrepancies that I, myself, have found.  So, that part of the job can be rewarding…..

It’s funny because my co-workers over the years have just seen me as this straight laced guy who dresses the part, is always punctual, etc.  I keep quiet about my traveling and my social life, so I’ve got to say that yeah, I’ve got them all fooled.  Just recently, I had someone at the office ask me “Do you ever party Big B?  You just seem to concentrate on your work and it might be nice for you to get out a little.  Let’s go grab a brewski some time.”

1) Yes, even my co-workers call me Big B

2) When he did try to get me out to the bar he did in fact use the word “brewski”, so 3) I didn’t go grab that drink

WILL YOU PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT YOUR REAL JOB!  THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A FUN BLOG….”

OK, I hear all of you out there complaining again, and I don’t blame you.  I just found it necessary to have 1 post about what I do…..Promise it won’t happen again!  Jeez!  But since I’ve got you all here, I’m going to end this post with a story that took place on a case I worked.  The topic is certainly not a funny subject, but the story itself is comedy gold!!  I heard the story second hand, but I’ve been assured that it is true. Here goes:

A suspected rapist was almost certainly going to be convicted.  There was a lot of evidence against him and the victim had said in her statement about 5 things about the suspected rapist, all of which were proved to be true.  The last thing that she had said was that the suspect had a really big dick.  The attorney representing the suspected rapist told his client that he was going to be convicted unless he could prove  that he didn’t have a really big dick.  The client asked the attorney if there was anything else he could do and he said no, there was just too much evidence against him, and everything the victim had said was proved to be true.  They had to prove she was a liar to have a chance for him to be acquitted.  Sensing there was no other way, the client agreed to show his attorney.  In the privacy of the lawyers office, the client asked one last time if there was any other avenue they could pursue and the attorney once again said no, so the client dropped his pants.  Looking down and realizing the victim had been telling the truth, the attorney looked at his client and said, “We better think about a plea bargain!”.

 

Until next time…..

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